Kick The But

Here follows a great story from Quora –

A very smart woman I worked with once told me that if I eliminated the word “but” from my professional vocabulary, I’d find greater acceptance for my ideas, and greater cooperation from my team members. She said people would have a very different perception of me if I could change this one thing.

The reason, she said, is because the word “but” negates everything that precedes it, and you cast a negative spin on anything you say when you use it.

Consider, for example, “We can do it this way, but it’ll be way too expensive given our budget,” versus “We can do it this way, and if we do, we’ll need to cut back on other important features.” The first indicates that we can’t even consider the option. The second acknowledges possibility and describes consequences.

“But” is exclusive and isolating, “and” is inclusive and welcoming.

She was absolutely right, and it’s advice I have used with great success for the past 30 years of my life.